


Fun Fact #5: Virginity Rocks!

by GraceRB



Series: Fun Facts With Dean and Cas [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Established Relationship, First Time, Fluffy, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Misunderstandings, Virgin Castiel, did i mention they're dumb?, dumb gay boyfriends, needless anxiety, well not anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 14:40:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29047794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GraceRB/pseuds/GraceRB
Summary: Dean is anxious. He gets over it.bonus: Cas gets a new shirt.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Fun Facts With Dean and Cas [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2080128
Kudos: 56





	Fun Fact #5: Virginity Rocks!

**Author's Note:**

> so I'm pretty sure there's a Buzzfeed Unsolved reference in here somewhere and I couldn't bring myself to delete it. Also I have no idea where it is. 
> 
> This is the fourth in the series, i recommend reading the other works before this one, but it can be read as a stand alone! 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

It’s not that Dean’s anxious. He’s excited. But it feels like snakes writhing around in his belly -- it’s a  _ bad _ excited. 

Fuck it, he’s anxious.

Cas has had his grace back for a week or two, and has been receptive to hand holding, kissing, and cuddling, but Dean has always had to initiate it. Sure, Castiel smiles and everything and lets Dean kiss him or lay against him, but Dean wants to blurt, “Are you only doing this because you think  _ I _ want you to?” 

But he doesn’t ask. So, he’s anxious. He’s worried that because Castiel is an angel again, he doesn’t feel emotions like love anymore. So the entirety of those two weeks, Dean has been smiling and nodding along and trying to gauge what Cas is  _ really _ feeling -- because he’s got it in his head that Cas is faking to spare Dean’s feelings. 

And it’s not like they sleep in the same bed together. If they ever kiss for a while in Dean’s room, Cas will leave to “let Dean sleep” and Dean, well, he’s convinced himself that a kind gesture on Cas’s part is actually just an avoidance tactic. 

So one night, Dean’s had enough. He doesn’t know how to voice his anxieties, so after he and Cas stop making out, Dean pretends to sleep. While crushing Cas to his chest, determined not to let the angel escape. He hooks his legs around the outside of Cas’ so he can’t swing them away, and his arms trap Cas’ underneath them. “Dean,” Cas says gently, because he thinks Dean is asleep.

“Mm?” Dean groans, pretending that he’s half asleep (but really he actually is half asleep).

“Please let go, you need to sleep,” Castiel tries to pull away, but Dean forces him back.

“Mm, no,” Dean says in that sleep filled voice. If Castiel were still human, he probably wouldn’t be able to understand what Dean had said. 

“Dean, please,” Castiel sounds like he’s getting more and more frantic.

“No,” Dean says quietly. Then he garbles out a determined, “Stay, please.”

“Dean, I  _ can’t _ ,” Castiel says, exasperated now. “Let go or I will have to force you.”

Dean wakes up a little more and opens his eyes. All he sees is the back of Castiel’s head as he tries to squirm out of Dean’s grasp. He’s getting angry now. He lets go completely, withdrawing all limbs and turns to face the other way. He grumbles, “It’s not that you can’t, Cas. It’s that you don’t want to.”

“Dean, please don’t be angry with me --”

Dean shoots up. “Don’t be angry? Don’t be  _ angry _ ?! What the fuck, Cas?” He glares, but Cas says nothing and looks away. “You don’t want to stay, so get out. I don’t want you to stay either.”

Castiel looks like he regrets saying anything, but despite his mouth opening, he says nothing. He slips into his shoes and picks up his suit jacket and trench coat. Dean lays back down and shuts his eyes so he doesn’t have to watch Cas leave,  _ again _ . Once was more than enough. Before the door closes, he hears a quiet and almost heartbroken sounding, “Good night, Dean.”

“Fuck off.”

Then the door shuts. 

Dean feels like pummeling himself in the face. Or maybe going out and provoking someone else to do it for him. He doesn’t sleep that night, and instead hugs the pillow that smells like Cas and tries desperately not to cry. 

Despite trying so hard, he fails.

-

Castiel is nowhere to be found in the morning. 

Dean feels awful, and wants to apologize, but he has no idea where the angel went. So he takes a cold shower to feel sorry for himself, then goes into the kitchen wearing a t-shirt that Cas liked to wear when he was human, hidden underneath a hoodie. He smells like him, so sue him.

He makes himself some sloppy eggs and half burnt bacon -- he wasn’t paying attention -- and sits down to eat when Sam comes in. “You wake up on the wrong side of the bed?” Sam tries to joke, but it only earns him a glare. 

“Shut up,” Dean barks.

“Whoa, Dean,” Sam sits across from his brother. “Are you okay? Did something happen last night?” 

Dean glares again. Then the look softens when he realizes hostility never got him anything. He looks away, “I yelled at Cas.”

“And he… he left, didn’t he?” Sam asks, his tone akin to someone connecting the dots. (I connected the two dots. You didn’t connect shit. I’ve connected them.)

“Yeah, Sammy,” Dean laughs bitterly. “Yeah, he did.”

Then Sam looks like he wants to say something. Dean raises his eyebrows as if they were an incentive. “I may have… I may have talked to him, um, last night?” Sam looks almost guilty, but tries to keep eye contact.

Dean stands forcefully, leaving his half eaten breakfast on the table. “You fucking told him to leave, didn’t you?”

“No! No!” Sam shakes his head, standing as well. He pauses and sits back down. “I just told him to go clear his head.”

“Sam!” Dean screeches. “If he thinks neither of us want him here, he won’t come back!” He scrambles back to his room to grab his phone, but stops halfway through while he’s in the map room, because he hears the front door open. Sam stays in the kitchen, and Cas walks down the steps with a small box in his hands. 

“Good morning, Dean,” He says like nothing catastrophic was happening literally thirty seconds ago. He sets his little box on the table and starts to reach into his jacket to grab something, but changes his mind when he sees Dean’s face. “What’s the matter? Are you hurt?”

Dean has to do a double take and he feels his lip quiver before he’s falling to his knees bawling. “I’m so sorry,” he sobs, trying to make himself as small as possible. 

“Dean,” Castiel’s voice is so gentle and calm and sad -- majorly sad. He falls to his knees in front of Dean and pulls him into a bear hug. “Dean, no, no, don’t blame yourself. Never blame yourself,  _ please _ .”

Dean sniffles and snakes his arms around Cas, “But I yelled at you and told you to leave -- I’m so sorry, please don’t leave.”

“Dean,” Castiel pulls back and runs a calming hand through Dean’s hair, the other coming up to cup his cheek and wipe away the tears. “You were angry with me. I was just getting you a pie.”

Dean’s eyes instantly dart to the table, then back to Cas. He grins. “You totally love me.” Cas shrugs, but he has a smile on his face, too. 

Then he gets serious, after wiping more tears from Dean’s face. “Can we talk in your room?”

Dean sniffs, and nods. 

They get up, Dean goes immediately for the pie, and Cas just laughs. They walk to Dean’s room together, Dean already digging into his delicious chocolate cream pie -- a well known delicious treat -- and groans because it tastes  _ so good _ . He notices Cas turns away for a second and his face looks… redder?

Huh. Interesting. He shrugs it off in favor of more pie. It’s sort of frozen so he has to stab at it, but it still tastes euphoric, so he can’t complain. They reach his bedroom door and he holds his fork in his mouth while he opens the door. He walks in, sits at his desk and eats. 

He hears the door shut, and a distinctive click of the lock. He swallows his bite and stands, abandoning his pie on the desk. “Um, Cas,” he clears his throat. “Did you lock the door?”

Cas just nods, his face looking extremely red, and he can’t quite meet Dean’s eyes. That doesn’t mean he isn’t  _ looking _ at Dean, just not specifically at his eyes or face. “Dean,” His voice is a little more rumbly than usual, so he clears his throat. “I believe I owe you an explanation for my behavior.”

Dean feels a wave of something -- not the air of a serious heart-to-heart type talk, but something much more… heated. He clears his throat as well and shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it, Cas. If you’re not ready -- or never want to do anything like that, then I can’t exactly force you.”

“Dean,” Cas says but it goes unheard.

“If it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll stop and we never have to think about it again,” He babbles for a little while, picturing dates with his right hand for the rest of his life. 

“Dean!” Castiel doesn’t shout, but he needs to get Dean’s attention. “ _ Listen _ before you go swearing off things.” Cas takes a deep breath and looks away, a blush creeping up his face. “You know how I feel about you --”

Dean cuts in, “But it’s… it’s different when you’re not human, isn’t it?” He sounds devastated, even to his own ears. He looks away and lets self-doubt flood in.

“What? No,” Castiel rushes forward to take Dean’s hands in his own. “No, Dean, I'm in love with you. Dean, I love you -- look at me -- _I love_ _you_.”

Dean almost wants to cry again. This is the first time Cas -- anyone really, that wasn’t Sam or Bobby -- has said  _ that _ . “Wh -- what? What? No, no you’re joking,” Dean shakes his head, physically unable to accept it. He wants to push away and hide somewhere.

Castiel looks at him like his heart just shattered into a million pieces. “Why can’t you -- Dean, I’m telling you that I love you and you can’t -- look at me,  _ please _ !” 

So Dean looks. His head is still shaking, until Castiel’s hands come up to stop it. “You’re -- you’re not joking,” Dean says. Castiel shakes his head, no, he’s not joking. “You love me.” Castiel nods. 

“I love you,” He says again. 

“Did you love me yesterday? And the day before that?” Dean asks, “And last week? And the week before that?”

Castiel nods to all of the questions. “I’ve loved you for a long time, Dean.”

“And you loved me last night?”

“Yes.”

“Then why did you leave?”

Castiel seems to freeze. He looks down at the floor. “Because along with my emotional love, I also feel,” He looks back up, his face completely red. “Physical love.” When Dean looks crestfallen, Cas clarifies, “Sexual love.”

Dean meets Castiel’s eyes and he can’t believe he didn’t see it before. “Then why didn’t you ask me to -- why didn’t you ask?”

“It seemed… inappropriate. It seemed unfair to push that on you when you’re so used to… being free to do what you want, when you want.” 

“That’s the nicest way someone’s ever called me a whore,” He tries to joke, but Castiel isn’t having it. 

“I didn’t say that. You’re allowed to be engaged in whatever type of relationship you want,” Castiel says, willing his voice to stay even and keep his devastation towards that option hidden. “If you want someone else -- you should be allowed to --”

“Cas,” Dean cuts in this time. “I don’t want anyone else. I want you.”

“You do?” Cas asks. “Even after… even after what happened?”

Something struck Dean as he nodded. He looked into Castiel’s eyes and reached for him, placing his hands on Cas’ face and shoulders. “Do you think all of this is one sided? You think I don’t love you too?”

Cas squeezes his eyes shut tightly and nods. “I was worried that you… I was worried.”

Dean looks at the floor and holds Castiel’s hand. “I’m so bad at this, Cas. Everyone leaves or they die and then I’m just... alone.” Dean looks up at Cas again and he wants to kiss him but he’s still not sure if it’s okay. “I told you before that I need you,” He looks away again. “And I still need you. I don’t want to be alone and I don’t want to be without you because --” He cuts himself off and looks back at Cas to hopefully work up some courage. “I love you. Don’t ever think any different.”

“You love me,” Cas smiles.

Dean nods. “I love you.” Dean wipes his face and grabs a tissue from his desk. “Since we… figured all that out, will you answer my question?” Cas tilted his head. “Why did you leave last night?”

Cas blushes immensely. His hands, resting on Dean’s hips, slide up a little to show Dean’s skin. “I want to kiss you everywhere, Dean. And you still need to sleep at night.”

“Well it looks like it’s only ten,” Dean looks at his watch. “We have all day, Cas. Seriously, if you want me, you can have me. You don’t need to wait because you feel like there isn’t enough time.”

“Okay,” Cas nods, all his attention focused on the skin between Dean’s hip bones. He looks back up at Dean’s eyes -- it takes some effort to draw his eyes away from Dean’s stomach -- and immediately Dean sees it. The angel’s pupils are dilated, his eyes are hazy, and he keeps licking his lips gently. “Dean.”

Dean’s eyes snap up and he realizes he was staring at Castiel’s lips for a long time without doing anything. “Cas, I only want to do this if you want to.”

“I want to,” Cas replies, and he sounds  _ hungry _ . “You have no idea how much I want to.”

-

It feels like a long time coming. Both Dean and Castiel have waited years for this. But they can’t find it in themselves to rush. 

Dean takes off Castiel’s tie and throws it to the floor, but that’s the quickest movement he makes. The rest is gentle and reverential, and Dean loves every sound he draws from Cas. Every twitch or jerk of squirm is added to Dean’s mental list of Favorite Things. He guides Castiel’s jacket and trench coat from his shoulders to puddle on the ground, unbuttons his shirt carefully, one button at a time, and takes off his belt in one smooth motion. 

“Cas,” Dean somehow draws his lips away to speak clearly. “Do you want me? Do you want me to take you?”

At first Castiel looks the slightest bit confused, but then he nods. “Yes, Dean.” He can feel that heat pooling in his stomach again, deep inside himself, and his hands roam over Dean’s body, pushing away his sweatshirt, dragging up his t-shirt -- pausing to admire that it was  _ his  _ shirt -- and toeing at his shoes. 

Dean lays Cas down on the bed, and hooks his thumbs into the waistband of his boxers. “Can I take these off?” 

Cas nods, “Take yours off too,” He sounds breathless. He watches hungrily as Dean gets off the bed, first to grab lube, then to take off his boxers and drop them to the floor. He looks a bit embarrassed, but Castiel takes him in, “You’re beautiful.” Dean grins bashfully and gets back on the bed, finally pulling off Cas’ boxers and throwing them over his shoulder. 

Hands keep roaming everywhere and their eyes lock -- no words need to be said now, it’s just them. Dean’s hands gently roam down to open Cas up a little bit, then he pauses and sits back on his heels. 

“What position do you want to be in?” He asks, starting to get nervous all over again. Anxiety starts buzzing around his edges and only when Cas’ hand touches the side of his face does he break his staring contest with the floor. 

“Dean, you don’t need to be nervous,” he says gently. He bends his legs and spreads them a bit -- so much so that Dean thinks maybe that isn’t comfortable -- to sit up and pull Dean into a hug. “Come here,” his voice is soft and welcoming, “Touch me.”

Dean swallows, eyes raking over just how exposed Castiel is and how much trust he must have -- it makes his heart do a little flutter. “Okay,” he nods. “Okay, I can do that.”

He kisses Castiel first, wrapping his arms around his body. It’s sweet and gentle, and when it starts to get more heated, Dean pulls away to lift Castiel’s legs and wrap them around himself. He starts to push in, and leans on Castiel, both groaning. They kiss again and Cas groans, “Dean, move.”

“I’m going, sorry,” Dean says, going a bit breathless as he starts thrusting. “I’m going.” 

Castiel chuckles a little, and pulls Dean to his chest to kiss him again. His nails rake across Dean’s back and they moan together. Cas practically screams when Dean is coherent enough to get a hand between them to jerk his cock, which had been neglected (not on purpose) before. It doesn’t take long before Dean is thrusting faster and erratically, hugging Cas tightly around his torso, and unable to even form kisses. Cas arches his back and Dean bites his shoulder, and they come together. 

“Oh, I bit you,” Dean pulls away, moving to lay next to Cas, and sees the angry red mark. “I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“Dean, I can heal myself,” He rolls his eyes playfully. “I can heal it now --”

“No!” Dean says quickly. “No, leave it. It’s… it’s kinda hot.”

Cas blushes. “Okay,” He says. His eyes drop to his stomach, which is messy, and he looks back at Dean. “It’s everywhere,” he mentions. “How do you usually clean it up?”

Dean scratches his head and blushes a little. “Well, you can use a wet washcloth or take a shower, I usually do one of those.”

“Can we take a shower?” Cas asks, and it sounds so uncertain. 

“Of course!” Dean gets up and gives Cas his robe to wear, then puts on a pair of boxers. “Put this on. I’ll go warm up the water.” 

He leaves the room, and Cas gets out of bed to put on the robe. He looks around the room as he ties it, at the floor strewn with discarded shirts and pants, at his trench coat piled by the desk (with Dean’s pie partially eaten and melting still sitting there), then turns to the bed, messy and weirdly dry. He smiles gently, and walks out the door towards the bathroom. Towards Dean, waiting for him. 

His smile grows. 

-

_ Little bonus scene:  _

Dean takes Cas to the mall, towards a store crawling with teenage boys. 

“Dean, I don’t understand. Why are we in this store?”

Dean grins and holds Castiel’s hand, dragging him to a corner of the store that’s less crowded, but still full of milling teenagers. He looks through a few shirts on hangers, then asks, “What size shirt are you?”

Cas looks down at his body, then tilts his head. “A size smaller than you, I think.”

“Cool,” Dean smiles, and drags Cas over to the register to buy the shirt. The cashier gives Dean a strange look, for buying something a bunch of teenagers are dying for, but shrugs and checks him out without any questions. She hands him his bag, and Dean grins, “Thanks,” and drags Cas back outside to the Impala. 

Once they’re settled inside, Dean says, “Take off your shirt, Cas.”

“Here?” Cas asks, blushing a little. “We’re still in the parking lot, Dean. That seems inappropriate.”

It’s Dean’s turn to blush. “That’s -- not what I -- I just want you to put on this shirt I bought you, then put your other stuff back on top of it.”

“Oh,” Cas smiles. “Okay.”

He does what Dean asked, and Dean starts driving back to the bunker. Cas gets out of the car, still wearing his suit jacket and trench coat, but now his tie and button up shirt are in his hand. Sam notices this immediately when they walk in. “Why aren’t you wearing a shirt, Cas?”

Cas tilts his head, then peels open his jackets to reveal the t-shirt Dean got him. “Dean bought me a new shirt.”

Sam reads the shirt, “Vir -- oh my god! Dean!” He gets up and leaves. 

Dean grins, and takes Cas’s hand again. “Why did he freak out?”

“I don’t know, Cas,” Dean is still grinning. He opens Cas’s jackets again and points at the words printed on the shirt. “Virginity rocks, right?” 

“I suppose,” Cas replies. “Sex is much better though.”

Dean laughs. 

Cas smiles and they kiss while he’s wearing a stupid shirt that says “Virginity Rocks!” 

**Author's Note:**

> So i think i'm getting better at sex scenes but idk. let me know what you think. 
> 
> Also Top Dean is probably only going to happen in a couple of these, I like Top Cas so much better. 
> 
> Did you find the Buzzfeed Unsolved reference? I still have not.


End file.
